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Off topic: Completely frivolous thread
Téma indítója: Tom in London

P.L.F.Persio  Identity Verified
Hollandia
Local time: 06:22
Tag (2010 óta)
angol - olasz
+ ...
Under the mistletoe Dec 23, 2020

Kiss_SCO

Give us a kiss, darlings.

I don't know the exact source of this image, but it was kindly given to me by Barbara Carrara. That's how we ladies roll.

Update: From a Visit Scotland tweet, this bad but sexy boy is probably based in Aberdeenshire.

[Edited at 2020-12-23 11:39 GMT]

[Edited at 2020-12-23 13:10 GMT]


expressisverbis
Zibow Retailleau
Chris S
Thomas T. Frost
Mervyn Henderson
Kay Denney
 

expressisverbis
Portugália
Local time: 05:22
Tag (2015 óta)
angol - portugál
+ ...
That made my day! Dec 23, 2020

Thank you so much, PLF Persio! And thank you too, Barbara!


A quick update:
My father doesn't get worse, which is great! And yesterday my sister was tested for Covid and her result was negative.
Only my brother-in-law is left now... but I'm confident that all be absolutely fine!


[Edited at 2020-12-23 13:14 GMT]


P.L.F.Persio
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Chris S
Thomas T. Frost
Matthias Brombach
Mervyn Henderson
Kay Denney
 

Sadek_A  Identity Verified
Local time: 00:22
angol - arab
+ ...
Shhhhhh, my sweet Stuart Littles Dec 23, 2020

I wanna concentrate on finding out all the juicy details that kept the husband and the lover colleague from defending Cross(i)bow Ret(ail)ation's honor! 😝😂

Dom tick, I hear a click
It's Cross(i)bow, oh no no 😨
All better behave, she's now with Dave
He quit hibernation, to hammer ret(ail)ation
There is no norm, Dave was the worm 😱 (???what???; oh, bow(ll)s, even I didn't see that coming!😝😂)

But, seriously, I think the medication
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I wanna concentrate on finding out all the juicy details that kept the husband and the lover colleague from defending Cross(i)bow Ret(ail)ation's honor! 😝😂

Dom tick, I hear a click
It's Cross(i)bow, oh no no 😨
All better behave, she's now with Dave
He quit hibernation, to hammer ret(ail)ation
There is no norm, Dave was the worm 😱 (???what???; oh, bow(ll)s, even I didn't see that coming!😝😂)

But, seriously, I think the medication had to be wearing off when the jump was made from money to penis without any presented connection whatsoever! Those who can't write shouldn't be writing!
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Jean Dimitriadis  Identity Verified
ProZ.com-tag
angol - francia
+ ...
With great power Dec 23, 2020

But those who know how to handle words deftly are surely aware of the impact they can have on others.

With great power comes great responsibility.

thread-983473-17214395931383090580

Sorry, try again.

[Edited at 2020-12-23 14:41 GMT]


expressisverbis
P.L.F.Persio
Zibow Retailleau
Mervyn Henderson
Beatriz Ramírez de Haro
 

Jean Dimitriadis  Identity Verified
ProZ.com-tag
angol - francia
+ ...
Poultry Dec 23, 2020

Chris S wrote:

I'm not a chat-up line kinda guy, but I did once tell a woman that I had three cocks.

To be fair, we were discussing poultry at the time.


What three paltry cocks can do anyway?

Oh yes, I’d be surprised.

I knew there was an easter egg somewhere.

[Edited at 2020-12-23 14:57 GMT]


P.L.F.Persio
Zibow Retailleau
expressisverbis
Mervyn Henderson
Chris S
Beatriz Ramírez de Haro
 

Kay Denney  Identity Verified
Franciaország
Local time: 06:22
Tag (2018 óta)
francia - angol
. Dec 23, 2020

Chris S wrote:

I'm not a chat-up line kinda guy,


Which may just explain your popularity! Women hate pick-up artists, and we can tell when a line has simply been rehearsed and recycled for whoever will listen.

Is talk about translation is allowed here? because I once had to provide some transcreation work for a famous hook-up website. They were devising a little robot to point out things that profiles had in common with your own, and it had to be funny. Since a lot of the jokes were based on puns, I had to then come up with other puns for those that didn't translate well. There were lots of corny things like "she loves Italian food, maybe you should offer her a pizza your heart", but I was told I could make it a bit racier if necessary. Researching the subject, I kept finding myself on horrific websites listing pick-up lines for various situations. I've never felt so glad I'm not in the "dating market"!


P.L.F.Persio
Zibow Retailleau
expressisverbis
Mervyn Henderson
Chris S
Beatriz Ramírez de Haro
 

Mervyn Henderson  Identity Verified
Spanyolország
Local time: 06:22
spanyol - angol
+ ...
@Chris Dec 23, 2020

I don't get it. You don't have three? But don't all us blokes have three?

[Edited at 2020-12-23 15:04 GMT]

[Edited at 2020-12-23 17:32 GMT]


P.L.F.Persio
Zibow Retailleau
expressisverbis
Chris S
Kay Denney
 

Jean Dimitriadis  Identity Verified
ProZ.com-tag
angol - francia
+ ...
Pizza your heart Dec 23, 2020

Kay Denney wrote:

[…] I once had to provide some transcreation work for a famous hook-up website. […] There were lots of corny things like "she loves Italian food, maybe you should offer her a pizza your heart" […]


How cheesy


expressisverbis
Zibow Retailleau
Mervyn Henderson
P.L.F.Persio
Chris S
Kay Denney
 

Mervyn Henderson  Identity Verified
Spanyolország
Local time: 06:22
spanyol - angol
+ ...
@Kay Dec 23, 2020

Talk about above and beyond the call of duty! Through these sleazy websites a dedicated translator must browse. I can just see you dipping into all that stuff (well, you know what I mean), and washing your hands repeatedly afterwards, even pre-Covid.

Pick-up lines? Back in the day the following worked at least once at 5 am in a disco when all the tottie had paired off with the macho lads long ago. Also food-related, in case that's important:

- "Do you like chicken, lov
... See more
Talk about above and beyond the call of duty! Through these sleazy websites a dedicated translator must browse. I can just see you dipping into all that stuff (well, you know what I mean), and washing your hands repeatedly afterwards, even pre-Covid.

Pick-up lines? Back in the day the following worked at least once at 5 am in a disco when all the tottie had paired off with the macho lads long ago. Also food-related, in case that's important:

- "Do you like chicken, lover?"
- "Ooh, yes, I luv chicken, me, I luvvit."
- "Well, chew on this then, girl, it's foul."

But drink had been taken, so I could have told her I was the Pope hearing confession, and it would have gone down just as well. Oh dear, there's another one.

I'm not proud of many things I did in the past.

[Edited at 2020-12-23 17:31 GMT]

[Edited at 2020-12-23 17:32 GMT]
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expressisverbis
P.L.F.Persio
Chris S
Kay Denney
 

expressisverbis
Portugália
Local time: 05:22
Tag (2015 óta)
angol - portugál
+ ...
Happy New Year! Dec 29, 2020

I hope you had a Merry Christmas.
The New Year is coming and it is time to forget the past and celebrate a new start!
Wishing you a happy, safe and healthy 2021, and may the world will be a safe place again for everyone!



[Edited at 2020-12-29 16:07 GMT]



[Edited at 2020-12-29 16:28 GMT]


Thomas T. Frost
P.L.F.Persio
Chris S
Mervyn Henderson
Matthias Brombach
Kay Denney
Zibow Retailleau
 

expressisverbis
Portugália
Local time: 05:22
Tag (2015 óta)
angol - portugál
+ ...
Wise Men's Day Eve Jan 5

No, I was not arrested on New Year's Eve and it seems that this is my first post of the year.
I hope you all had a good New Year's Eve!
Let's make a wish when seeing the star of the Three Kings on this Wise Men's Day Eve, so that 2021 will be a better year for the world.
Three Kings' Day is an important Christian holiday in many Spanish speaking countries, Spain and also in Portugal.
It is believed that Wise Men from the East, astrologers, reached Bethlehem to worship the
... See more
No, I was not arrested on New Year's Eve and it seems that this is my first post of the year.
I hope you all had a good New Year's Eve!
Let's make a wish when seeing the star of the Three Kings on this Wise Men's Day Eve, so that 2021 will be a better year for the world.
Three Kings' Day is an important Christian holiday in many Spanish speaking countries, Spain and also in Portugal.
It is believed that Wise Men from the East, astrologers, reached Bethlehem to worship the infant Jesus and offer him gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh.

1c824577dd523803e34154620b3a1b87



[Edited at 2021-01-05 16:56 GMT]
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Thomas T. Frost
P.L.F.Persio
Mervyn Henderson
Chris S
Matthias Brombach
 

Mervyn Henderson  Identity Verified
Spanyolország
Local time: 06:22
spanyol - angol
+ ...
Gold, frankincense and myrrh Jan 5

Thanks, Exy!! Yes, you've been dragging your Luso feet on the forums recently, but I'm glad to hear the police weren't called out to the bar, and that you are obviously in one piece.

On the subject of the title, a late news report just in from Bethlehem:

Joseph: "... no, it isn't, it's not ingratitude, Mary. I wouldn't call it ingratitude. And of course the gold will come in handy. I just wish we'd had it before we had to sleep in this manger, that's all, not after. We
... See more
Thanks, Exy!! Yes, you've been dragging your Luso feet on the forums recently, but I'm glad to hear the police weren't called out to the bar, and that you are obviously in one piece.

On the subject of the title, a late news report just in from Bethlehem:

Joseph: "... no, it isn't, it's not ingratitude, Mary. I wouldn't call it ingratitude. And of course the gold will come in handy. I just wish we'd had it before we had to sleep in this manger, that's all, not after. We could have paid for something better, instead of committing ourselves to two nights slumming it on straw beds alongside the oxen and the goats and the donkeys. I mean, the stench in this place, doesn't it get to you?"

Mary: "But you heard what the man said, Joseph. You were there too. 'No room at the inn', he said."

J: "No room at the inn, no room at the inn! Well, they always say that, don't they? They always keep a few rooms back, you know. And the gold would have swung it, that's all I'm saying. I'm going to reception with the gold later, see if I can't get a better deal for tomorrow night, love. But then ... the rest of it? That frankin ... what was it? frank sense ...?

M: "Frankincense, Joseph."

J: "Yeah, whatever. I mean, what? Who gives a kind of perfumey resin to a kid? I can just see the kid trying to figure out how the hell to play with that one when he gets a bit older. And as for that myrrh, well ... Myrrh? Mirror, I thought he said, like he had a little looking glass for the kid to see himself in, and then he brings out these little rocks like they actually were something. I mean, these people are supposed to be kings, for crying out loud. You'd think they'd have a little more class ... oh, no, really? Did you see that? Did you see what they did there? ALL the donkeys squeezing one out at the same time? Seriously? Seriously.

[Edited at 2021-01-06 06:13 GMT]
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expressisverbis
Chris S
P.L.F.Persio
 

expressisverbis
Portugália
Local time: 05:22
Tag (2015 óta)
angol - portugál
+ ...
Thanks for your good sense of humour! Jan 5

Thanks for the good humor, as always, Mervyn!
What a funny story
No, I didn't go to the bar, but, in fact, I know the police was there and they made a fine show for a change
Yes, I dragged my feet on that forum lately, but I rushed back here because I got scared with certain questions that were asked.
It's the result of certain translat
... See more
Thanks for the good humor, as always, Mervyn!
What a funny story
No, I didn't go to the bar, but, in fact, I know the police was there and they made a fine show for a change
Yes, I dragged my feet on that forum lately, but I rushed back here because I got scared with certain questions that were asked.
It's the result of certain translators wanting to translate into a language other than their mother tongue.
It is all a matter of common sense and respect for other colleagues.

[Edited at 2021-01-05 18:00 GMT]
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Mervyn Henderson
P.L.F.Persio
 

P.L.F.Persio  Identity Verified
Hollandia
Local time: 06:22
Tag (2010 óta)
angol - olasz
+ ...
Gold, frankincense and myrrh, Part II: Mary's point of view Jan 6

Mervyn Henderson wrote:

Joseph whining and complaining



Oh, boo hoo, Joseph! Pray tell, who's the one having contraptions all day and night, trying to squeeze the King of Kings out of her never-travelled-before-in-either-ways road? Yours truly, if you haven't noticed yet.

Who's the one knocked up at the age of 15 by a much, much older man? I'd rather have had my cherry popped by that young and fit Gabriel, but he told me he was asexual, although I'm pretty sure he's gay, but it's OK, not being judgmental, just a tad annoyed.

I still can't believe my parents thought it was all right and totally plausible, having a virgin yet pregnant daughter, but then they're positive that I was conceived without them "sinning”, so they're not exactly the sharpest tools in the box, are they?

Yes, the gold will come in handy. We need nappies for the baby, and sanitary towels for me, as I've been leaking all kind of unpleasant stuff for the last 2 weeks. Childbirth isn't for the faint-hearted, nor for the weak stomachs.

Now Joseph, be a lamb and burn some of that frankincense, while I try to latch on the baby, and don't peek at my boobs, thank you very much! No sex for the next 6 weeks, mister, deal with it. We must observe quarantine and I'm in total lockdown, if you catch my drift.

In your own name, Jesus baby, stop screaming the roof down, and let mummy sit up straight. Gentlemen, do you mind? I'm trying to breastfeed our Lord here, no need to perv! Easy tiger, you may be the Son of God, but you're a little bugger, just like any other newborn. Who's a hungry boy? Who's mummy's cheeky little monkey? Who's the most beautiful little man in the world? You are, yes you are, my love.


Mervyn Henderson
Thomas T. Frost
Chris S
expressisverbis
 

Mervyn Henderson  Identity Verified
Spanyolország
Local time: 06:22
spanyol - angol
+ ...
Part II Jan 6

Wonderful, as usual, PLF!!! I can just see it all happening there. It's not all you, Joseph!

And the difficulty of spinning it off plausibly to pa and ma, certainly. Mary of the Fourth Form comes home from the comprehensive in her uniform, chewing her gum, and says, Hey, I have a bun in the oven, but it's what they call a maculate, no, immac- ... immaculate deception, no, immaculate conception, that was it, so it's cool, really. The doctor says all I need is a few days away in a man
... See more
Wonderful, as usual, PLF!!! I can just see it all happening there. It's not all you, Joseph!

And the difficulty of spinning it off plausibly to pa and ma, certainly. Mary of the Fourth Form comes home from the comprehensive in her uniform, chewing her gum, and says, Hey, I have a bun in the oven, but it's what they call a maculate, no, immac- ... immaculate deception, no, immaculate conception, that was it, so it's cool, really. The doctor says all I need is a few days away in a manger, and I don't even need a crib for a bed. And Joe's fine with it, too.
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P.L.F.Persio
Chris S
expressisverbis
 
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